The Physical Battle Part I

The brain, a physical and bio-chemical marvel, needs just as much attention (maybe more) as the rest of your body! What is stopping you from getting your mental health check-up? The source of your joylessness could be physical.

What is the first thing that pops into your brain when you read the words Physical Battle? If your brain is anything like mine, your imagination goes first to the body muscles and working out. Although, a rocking bod and endorphin rush from exercise are equally awesome, I first wish to address a part of your body that is way more important and most essential to overall health—your brain! This little 3-pound organ oversees every function for the rest of your body. Without proper function of our brains, life as we know it is greatly altered and near impossible. So why do we delay in attending to proper function of this most vital organ? Fear of what that could mean. Specifically, I’m talking about your mental health.

Before I go on, I want to thank you for following me on this “Fight for Joy” journey! We have explored the Mental, Emotional, and Spiritual Battlefronts; and if you haven’t noticed, there is overlap and fluidity. Because we are our thoughts, our emotions, our beliefs, and lastly our physical and chemical composition! Each effects the other, so if one is off, the others are thrown off too.  When battling joylessness, it’s important to ask yourself, where might the source of joylessness be emanating from?  Many would like to ignore the possibility that their brain chemistry is not quite right—the implications are too daunting. Let me share my story, in hopes that you find the strength to investigate your possible lack of mental health. 

From as far back as I can remember, I recall times of great sadness, even despair.  One can argue the dysfunction of my family life would likely be the cause. And no doubt, these family dynamics, and even traumatic events, made an indelible mark on brain and soul. I was exposed to words and behaviors that created toxic neural pathways and changed the structure of my brain.  (As an aside, did you know that the brain imaging of a parent of a child with special needs resembles that of a war veteran? Interesting.) Thankfully, there are techniques that I have discussed in previous blogs on the Mental Battlefront, that help you examine your stinking thinking, bring toxic thought patterns into your awareness, help you exchange healthy thoughts for toxic thoughts, and in time change the actual structure of your brain. See Dr. Caroline Leaf. Recently, I’ve discovered the Metanoia Catholic Journal and Academy, who use a Catholic approach to this kind of thought work, which has been really helping me personally and professionally in my coaching.

But what if this kind of thought work only brings more anxiety or doesn’t seem to do the trick? Besides, many people have terrible childhoods, but not all feel physically unable to pick themselves up from out of the funk. What then? Folks, I’m talking about a mental health diagnosis. Too scary? It was for me. I always suspected, something was not quite right with my moods and intense emotions, especially sadness. Throughout my childhood, and much more pronounced during my tumultuous adolescence, despite being the life of the party and overall, an optimist, I struggled to hold onto lasting joy. It was like part of me was held deep under water, and from there, I could see a good life happening above the water, but I couldn't access it or feel it’s goodness. Part of me was drowning. I became really good at pretending to be joyful and masking the pain. I endlessly sought quick fixes to induce pleasure as a substitute for authentic joy.  Alcohol, sex, notoriety etc., I went to many extremes to try and fix my brokenness. Thankfully, my return to the Church and practicing my faith alleviated my pain in a way that vices never could. Yet, there remained a piece that faith alone could not heal.   

It wasn’t until after I was married, and we were struggling to conceive that my struggle with a mental health diagnosis became undeniable. With the hormones from fertility treatment raging and thoughts about my worth as a “barren woman” racing within me, I was finally diagnosed with Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder (PMDD), a very severe form of premenstrual syndrome (PMS). However, I suspect that I have struggled on and off with some type of clinical depression throughout my life. Nonetheless, I finally got the medical treatment necessary to fill in the gaps of my brain chemistry that good thoughts and prayers alone could not and were not improving.  I can’t tell you what a relief and order the right medications brought to my thinking! After being on treatment for a month or two, I was able to focus on uprooting the negative thoughts with the help of prayer and counseling. The meds slowed down the racing thoughts to a pace that I could process. I could then choose what was trash and needed to be discarded, and what was valuable and needed to be amplified. 

I do not wish to give the wrong impression and exclude how my Faith helped me through this difficult time. Without God and learning who I am as a daughter of God the Father, I know mental health would be an impossibility for me. Medicine alone will not solve a mental health crisis. It is a combination of modalities—prayer, therapy/counseling/coaching, exercise, medication—that bring well-being. But above all, God healed me. How do I know? Because before faith and forming a prayer life, I was too afraid to face a diagnosis. I thought a mental health diagnosis would define me and no one, including myself, would take me seriously or believe anything I had to say.  No wonder I was petrified. But can you blame me?

There is no doubt a stigma surrounding mental health diagnoses. As a society, we love labels! And cancel culture seeks to destroy credibility when thoughts or ideas are unpopular. Super scary! Thankfully, there does seem to be a rising awareness and inclination toward empathy when it comes to mental illness.  Yet, I’m not sure I like the trend toward wearing mental illness as a badge of honor. I personally do not identify as my mental health diagnosis and find that line of thinking disabling. Simply, I am a woman who with the help of God and modern medicine is overcoming many challenges, one of which is a mental health diagnosis.  A diagnosis doesn’t have to mean everything! It is just one facet to the dimensions of what make you, you. Think about it. Do we make other physical diagnoses become the entirety of a human being? No. People have all kinds of ailments that require medical treatment—asthma, diabetes, hypertension, etc.—yet we don’t shame them for seeking or receiving diagnosis and treatment. Understanding your diagnosis and getting proper treatment will only help you be more yourself—your best self.  Don’t allow what others may or may not think prevent you from getting the help you desperately need.  Why risk being the crazy person without a diagnosis? Wouldn’t you rather be the perfectly sane individual on meds?

If this blog post has stirred up some questions about your mental health, please don’t delay making an appointment to see a licensed mental health professional! Until next time, choose Joy in the name of Jesus!